It’s just a kiss away: Red lips phone debuts for Valentine’s Day and Rolling Stones’ tour

When you think rock ‘n’ roll and statement lips, who comes immediately to mind? Yep, Mick Jagger. The Rolling Stones front man has been as famous for his mouth as for his music for more than 60 years, and the band still commands a stage like the legends they are.

The Stones’ protruding tongue and lips logo is arguably one of the most iconic logos anywhere, not just in the music industry. Yet surprisingly, the logo wasn’t modeled on Mick’s generous mouth but on the Hindu goddess Kali, though it bears an uncanny resemblance to the rock star.

Speaking of signature lips, this is a ripe moment to “Paint It Red” (to pun on one of many recognizable Stones’ tunes), with a retro lips phone from Ooma, just in time for Valentine’s Day and the Rolling Stones’ Hackney Diamonds tour that starts April 28 in Houston and features the bright red lips and tongue logo, sparkling with digital diamonds per the tour theme.

Give me some lip

While we may be wedded to our screens today, Ooma’s retro phone bundles call us back to a more innocent time, when the person on the other end of the line was a mystery until you picked up the handset and said, “Hello.” If you’ve been considering reinstalling a home phone, or if your significant other is wondering why choose a home phone when we have so many digital devices, a novelty landline phone puckered up and waiting on a friend is just the ticket.

Think about it: Lips phones aren’t only cute; they’re a way to give lip (or lip service) that’s perfectly respectable. A lips-shaped telephone can stir romance in a teenager’s heart, and makes the perfect Valentine’s Day gift—especially if they’ve been lobbying for a phone of their own. At just $149.99 MSRP for the landline lips phone, an Ooma Linx wireless adapter and Ooma Telo Air base station, this bundle is also a cool fraction of the cost of a new digital device, something parents can appreciate.

In addition, “retro” means there’s no screen, which can be a plus if you spin it the right way. For teens, appearance is all, and there are times they may not want to do a video chat if they aren’t one hundred percent camera-ready.

So sell the kids on the allure of being able to talk with their friends without fretting about how they look, allowing them to parse the conversation for hidden romantic meaning while coiling the red cord around a finger.

Is this playing the red card? Perhaps. However you play it, it can be fun for everyone.

My lip-lovin’ Valentine

Valentine’s Day and red retro lips phones are another perfect pairing, like Scarlett and Rhett, Barbie and Ken, strawberries and chocolate fondue. February 14 is when hearts, flowers, candy and everything else red reigns supreme.

The origins of the holiday remain shrouded in the mists of time, though popular lore claims a priest named Valentine was martyred in third century Rome for marrying young lovers in secret, after Emperor Claudius outlawed marriage for young men, believing single guys made better soldiers.

Valentine greetings themselves date back to the Middle Ages. The oldest known written valentine is a poem from 1415, scribbled by Charles, Duke of Orleans, to his wife while he was imprisoned during battle.

What lengths these lovers had to go to before phones were invented! If St. Valentine had a lips phone and an Ooma Basic home phone plan, one quick call to a local jurist (a lawyer in ancient Rome) might have saved his life. Charles could have phoned his wife to declare his undying love—but then we wouldn’t have his prized parchment memento.

Life is a series of trade-offs, true. But retro lips phones are a mouthwatering sure bet when it comes to communication in 2024.

With a lips telephone, you’ll get satisfaction, even if you don’t get to see the Stones on tour. And that’ll be music to your ears.